tough decision

I hate having to make decisions that will impact not only my life but others as well.
A job opening has come up in a school much closer to me. I would be cutting my driving time and gas bill in half. Plus, I would be able to participate in the events outside of school that are just too far for me to attend at the present school.
Those are the only pluses.
On the down side: I love where I teach now. If I stay, I'll being doing the same thing 2 years in a row for a change, and actually feel like I know what I'm doing. I love the people I work with and I think they like me back, I would miss that. I've heard horrible things about the school that has the opening, in fact, I interviewed for this same opening almost 3 years ago and didn't get it. I believe it has been open another time since then as well, so why won't anyone stay? Jim feels that since I have done so well "fitting in" where I am now, I can just do the same thing at the other school and get the same results, I'm not so sure. This is truly the first time in my life that I feel like I fit in and that people actually like me, what if the rumors I've heard about the attitudes of the people at the other school are true and they make me miserable? Is it worth saving a few bucks? Actually, the county I'm in now gives a stipend every year which about covers the difference in gas, so I'll be breaking even unless the other county does the same. I've put in my application and I guess I just need to leave it up to what God thinks is best for me...

the roller coaster has stopped (for now!)

What a week! Going from the highest of highs Sunday to the lowest of lows Monday, only to find out that false accusations were made and someone was accused before all the avenues were tried. Good thing the accuser can be a man and not only apologize, but promise to make it right. The best thing in all of this is that the accuser finally sees and acknowledges how quick he is to judge certain people, and wants to make it right. I'm glad the accused can accept the apology and be open to things, maybe, finally changing.
I did lose 2 pounds this week! My computer crashed on Wednesday and I just got it back; funny how you don't realize how much time you spend on something until it's no longer there to to use! Anyhow, I haven't been on the WW site to log in my weight loss or foods since the crash, and I know I'll never remember at this point all that I ate, so I'm going to try to watch on my own and see what the scale says on Thursday.
Busy week again, VBS Monday-Friday from 9-12, then various activities almost every night. Plus we need to fit in math practice, French, and instrument practice! I'm tired just thinking about it!

then the world crashed in

The day after my last post, my entire world came crashing down. I don't want to go into details here, let's just say that the dream I'd always prayed for is never going to happen. To go from such a high on Sunday to the bottom of the pits on Monday is emotionally draining, to say the least. After 24 hours of holding back tears (sort of), I finally have come to the acceptance stage of grief. This really should have happened years ago but being an eternal optimist I refused to give up. So, now, I'm throwing in the towel. I'll never stop hoping for this to fix, but I can no longer spend such an amount of emotional energy on it, especially since it's beyond my control (reminder to self: I can only control ME, no one else).
I'm done.
So on the diet front, when I'm mad or agitated, I pig out. When I'm in a significant emotional state, I can't eat at all, so I should show a weight loss tomorrow. I've gotten in plenty of exercise moving things around my classroom, running back and forth to gather/put away things. I learned a dance Monday in clogging that I've wanted to learn for a while, but since I'm the only one that doesn't know it, I couldn't get them to slow down enough for me to get it. So, I've been practicing that as well. I found out about another dance style they do at the folk school, English Country, that I'm told doesn't have the spins that contra does, so I'm going to keep a look out for that and sign up. Today is my last official day of work until August 1st, so I'm going to plan some activities for James and I, including our French lessons and 6th grade math. He's really enjoying learning French and I'm surprised at how easily it's coming back to me from the classes I took in Junior High! He earned a free pass to Six Flags in Atlanta that we'll do next week and we're going to Chattanooga tomorrow to see one of Jim's old favorites, Uriah Heap. (I've never heard of them, but he played a song for James and James loves them-he's the one that wants to go to the concert!) Also on the plans for the next few weeks: Charleston and other spots in SC, Dollywood in Pigeon Forge, and Stone Mountain, GA. These are all day trips for us (except Charleston) since we live so far west in NC, so the only cost will be gas (ugh!) and admission.

aaahhhh, calm and serene

Whew! What a crazy few weeks it's been, both personally and professionally. Testing didn't end until the last full day of school, how crazy is that! Although, it would make more sense to have testing the last week of school rather than 3 weeks out; those that passed just come to school and play while the rest prepare to re-test.
I lost one pound this week, which puts me at one-over-par for where I was, but still closer! Finding time to log my WW points combined with the male of the species wanting fattening foods all the time (there is only so much time in a day!) has become challenging. Now that DJ and Di are completely moved into their own place, I may have more time, but I doubt it as I didn't spend a whole lot of time doing for them (only worrying about them!).
Good news! DJ's divorce should be final by this Wednesday, then he has to wait 30 days and he and Di can get married! Yeah! They both sounded very positive about it, and I sensed something different (in a good way) in both of them today. Haylee's baptism is being put off until her family can come down from PA, which should be next month. So, they are on the right track!
I get to spend some time with James the next few days. He'll be coming to work with me. We'll probably be the only ones in the building, as usual, but that's OK. Clogging Monday, Contra Tuesday, Karate Wednesday, concert in Chattanooga Thursday (Uriah Heap!), and hopefully sleep on Friday because Haylee comes on Saturday for our weekly time together. Sounds like a plan!

can you say "stressed"?

Ok, so I maintained my weight this week, which is a victory because I thought I'd gained again! Not looking so good for the next weigh-in though! Having all these make-up snow days after testing has concluded makes no sense. Of course, there is a huge group that has to re-test this week, so why don't we just let the others stay home? It would make crowd control a lot easier and reduce the chances of mis-administration of the re-test settings. Just saying...
On the home front, DJ, Di, and Haylee have moved out (sort of). I'm not feeling really good about this, I worry about them so much. They are so young and clueless and have have their priorities all awack! I try so hard to be positive and speak positive in the hopes that the positive aura will surround them and turn them around, but I'm not seeing it yet.And that beautiful baby is in the middle of it all. They are both wonderful people, have so many good qualities, but sometimes it's hard to see them when they insist on dramatizing the negative! The sad thing is, they remind me so much of how clueless and self-absorbed I was. I was about 24 when I started to see the light, and it's been slow progress since then. I'd also made many mistakes that I'm still paying for 24 years later! I guess our genes call for us to learn the hard way, I just hope they learn!